week one

(my rescuer's)

Well writing each day went well! My life has gone down the rabbit hole in one week. So I will list the jolly shit show to process this:

Jobless (walked out)

Car set on fire (see above 🤦🏽‍♀️)

Broke

Emotional breakdown x1

Process of cutting out my ex from my life ( you will do it this time)

Decided to learn to code

Tackeling online learning

Starting own business 

Had a shower x1

Missed MOT

Hid in bed for about 100 hours.

It's safe to say at this point I'm unsure what effects the new meds have had. It's hard to tell given the onslaught of the above. I have however started to listen to music again, now I'm off the SSRI's I can feel again. I did get a little racing heart at the begining and a feeling of happiness. I don't think this was the meds, probably a psychosomatic response to actually being treated.

I have leaned very heavy on support of a FB group called the 'dysfuntion' they have been an amazing support, especially on the bad day I had. There is nothing better than having a giggle at yourself with people who understand the actual shit show of ADHD. (check them out if your reading this).

I've not had any alcohol and having a bastard of a headache due to caffeine withdrawal. This is not something you have to do on meds ( I don't think so anyway). But for me adding caffeine at this stage of titration really fluffed with my head and heart rate. So now other than nicotine all my coping strategies although bad for me have gone. I know it's for the best but Christ it's hard as hell. I miss my monster energy drinks, cider and caffeine pills.

But today as I'm writing I'm feeling positive, today is a good day. I've made plans with a friend ( we will see if I follow them through). I plan to attend I always do plan to but for some reason on the day I flake. Now I know why and I can work on it. I've lost so many friends this way over the years, hit upwards and onwards.

Oh one last positive thing I have had three nights of sleep which have been a solid 8hrs. Honestly after functioning for years on 3 hours of sleep this has been a massive change. That has to be due to meds, with everything that's gone on last week my head would be spinning at night. Itbhasent completely gone a way but I will take the little wins when I get them.

Toodles